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  1. superjedi's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 5:29 PM - Lost my Mom yesterday #1

    On February 27, 2011 at 10:45 am (California time), my mom Susan passed away from complications arising from lung cancer. She was 68 years and 2 days old.

    It's hard to believe she's not with us any more and I'm still pretty numb.

    She was first diagnosed about 4 or so years ago. But there's no telling how long she had it prior to that time. It was a slow-growing form of cancer and it was deemed very treatable. She went through surgery to remove one lobe of the affected lung, and went through chemo and radiation therapy, which she tolerated well. After going through her course of treatment, she was said to be cancer-free. She was only required to return to her oncologist once every 6 months for a follow-up PET scan.

    Recently, she had problems getting tired easily and was short of breath. My dad took her to the doctor and they discovered there was a buildup of fluid around her lung and heart. We were told this was a bad sign that the cancer had potentially returned. The fluid was tested and found to contain cancerous cells.
    The fluid build up was severe enough that the doctor decided to have her go through another surgery to cut a "window" in her pericardial sac to allow fluid to drain naturally so it wouldn't put pressure on her heart.

    After recovering at home for a few weeks from this procedure, she was again getting very fatigued and out of breath. My dad brought her back to the hospital again and she was diagnosed with pneumonia. After some other tests they found the cancer had spread to her other lung and lymphatic system.

    After a few days in the hospital, she lapsed into an unresponsive state late on Friday, February 25th, her 68th birthday. A day and a half later, she passed on, never regaining consciousness. My dad, Bob, and my younger brother Adam were at her side at the end. I had no opportunity to make it out to California before she went, but my dad held his cell phone up to her ear on Saturday afternoon so I could say what would be my last words to her.

    She was a wonderful mother and wanted nothing but the best for my brother and sister and I. She was not thrilled with my choice to join the military years ago! But as I had retired on January 1st, she knew that part of my life was over and I was "safe."

    I miss you, Mom. The family somehow seems much smaller than the loss of one person should allow.

    If you're a person of faith, please keep my dad in mind as he begins to bear going on without her.
  2. Triple-d's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 5:35 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #2

    I am sorry for the loss of your mother. I lost my father 5 years ago to pancreatic cancer. Me and my families thoughts and prayers are with you and your father. She is in a better place now where this is no pain.
  3. CrazyDart's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 5:37 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #3

    Sorry for your loss. While I haven't lost a parent, I've had many other family members pass and it's always tough. It may seem cliche but your mom's in a better place now where she won't suffer ever again.

    She'll always be with you and your family. I'm not religious but I do believe that our loved ones who die are always around to watch over us.
  4. lawdawg 35's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 5:38 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #4

    SuperJedi...

    I don't know what to say...Prayers go out for you and your family...Somehow that seems inadequate... I hope you and your family can take comfort in the fact that her ordeal is over,and she is in a better place now!

    My family's best to you and yours in the coming days......
  5. Mullreel's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 5:58 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #5

    Superjedi,

    My last grandparent died last week. It hurts to lose family. I have lost all of my grandparents, my dad (heart attack 53), a stepdad (cancer 42), a daughter (kidney disease infant) and several other relatives. The two toughest were my daughter and my dad.

    I have learned to never say "I know how you feel" because I don't. I do know how I felt and still feel. I hope the best for you and your family during these next days and the coming year. I know I marked each holiday of the year with this is the first "xxxxxx" without them.

    I never felt so old as when my daughter died.
    I never felt so young as when my dad died.

    Chris

    I am sorry for your loss.
  6. Feb 28, 2011, 6:25 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #6

    You have my sincerest condolences superjedi, I love my mom dearly, she's almost the same age (67) as your mom and I can only imagine how hard it would be to lose her now, I keep saying to her... "Mom, you need to make it to at least 80", which is when her mom / grandma passed away, so every day is a blessing until then. For those of us that are fortunate enough to have a really good mother / parents are truly blessed, so many people grew up not even knowing that kind of love and support. May God be with you and your family during this tough time and beyond, hopefully you find comfort in knowing she's in a much better place.

    Sincerely,

    GBH
  7. Mr Fett's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 7:05 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #7

    So sorry to hear this, superjedi. All of us TDHers mourn her loss. What I mean is, while we did not know her, your support network here stands strong.
  8. Feb 28, 2011, 7:33 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #8

    I can not contemplate how you are feeling. Although I do not know you personally, just know that mine, as well as everyone else's thoughts here on TDH, are of you and your family.
    Hope you are okay,
    sincerely,

    Welsh
  9. Lucksy31's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 7:40 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #9

    Thoughts and prayers brother....
  10. formerly Woodman woodman's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 7:57 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #10

    really sorry to hear that brother, you have my prayers.
  11. crow62's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 8:33 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #11

    I lost my mom at 11yo, 38 years later, I feel she is always with me, she keeps taking my hand and giving me lovely advices. I hope you will feel the same nearly.
    We, at home will pray for you and your father
    Sicerely
    Giovanni
  12. SmuWindu's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 8:44 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #12

    SuperJedi, my condolences to you and your family. Nothing I can say can make anything better but my prayers are with you all.
  13. FettFanatic's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 8:50 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #13

    Man I am so sorry to hear this. I lost my Mom to cancer in 2005. She was 51. It hurts so much to lose someone so close to you. I can tell you that the pain never goes away, but in time you learn how to deal with it. The good memories do start to replace the bad. I hope you will reach out if you ever need to talk.
  14. Evilhemmes's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 10:27 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #14

    Master Superjedi, sorry to hear of your loss, prayers and thoughts are with you, your father and family in this difficult time.
  15. WTFett's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 10:55 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #15

    Sorry to hear this, you and your family will be in my prayers.
  16. deadland's Avatar
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    Feb 28, 2011, 11:31 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #16

    In our thoughts and prayers brother.
  17. Admin Staff obi sean kenobi's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 7:44 AM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #17

    So sorry my friend. Thoughts and prayers are with you. Sean
  18. boba68's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 8:11 AM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #18

    sorry for your loss brother.....
  19. Member Since
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    Mar 1, 2011, 9:49 AM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #19

    Hey Im sorry to hear about your loss.
  20. BH-2647's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 10:23 AM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #20

    my condolences to you, brother !
  21. Member Since
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    Mar 1, 2011, 12:30 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #21

    Sorry for your loss.
    I lost my mother to throat cancer 2 years ago and still miss her every day.
    Remember to talk about your feelings to those who will listen.
    There is nothing worse than bottling your feelings up.

    Thinking of you
    Craig
  22. darkbambi's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 3:11 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #22

    sincere condolences to you ...
    will sent you good vibrations from France as much as possible to support you and your family
  23. superjedi's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 3:52 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #23

    Thanks for all the kind thoughts, everyone.
    My emotions are all over the place. I feel a little better after talking to my dad and brother for a while last night, but it's still just a surreal feeling.

    I just started a new job a week ago Monday and fortunately they are very understanding and have allowed me a couple of days off. My wife just went through this same experience with her mom last October and she's been very supportive, even if it just means being there for me.

    I know it will take time to recover from this, but I know I've got my family and friends to talk to when I need it. Even my "internet friends" who I may not have ever met face to face. Thanks again.
  24. Dahone's Avatar
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    Mar 1, 2011, 4:45 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #24

    I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My prayers are with you and your family. May she rest in peace.

    Rich
  25. batmann539's Avatar
    Member Since
    May 2010
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    Mar 2, 2011, 5:45 PM - Re: Lost my Mom yesterday #25

    SuperJedi,
    Sorry for your loss brother. You're family will be in my prayers.

    Sean

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